Zades: Wicked One Shots
by QueenCanarrowDeathstroke
Summary: A collection of all things Zades! One Shots featuring Zelena/Hades mostly AU's (I take requests for one shots)
1. AU: High School (1)

I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.

 **High School AU: Meeting Hades**

Zelena Mills is wicked. A fact everyone knows. Zelena Mills is a wicked one. Evil, a nasty piece of work. If you want to be cool and popular at Storybrooke High you do not make friends. Or even any contact with Zelena Mills and woe betide those who do!

The only people who don't hate Zelena and actually have some respect for her, unlike the rest of the school who treat her like she's some kind of monster and her family who are even worse! Are Emma Swan and her boyfriend Killian Jones. Now Zelena would never call them her friends, yet they are the closest thing she has to actual friends. However, Emma and Killian are together and having to hang around them makes Zelena feel a lot like the third wheel!

"Ohh bloody hell!" Zelena murmurs, feeling slightly nauseated at the make out scene between Emma and Killian in front of her. She'd say something to their faces. She has at many of an occasion but they have literally been letting her sit with them at their table at lunch time and it's either that then go back to eating in the toilets. Alone. Not that she doesn't like being alone, she loves being alone more then anything but there is something about eating alone Zelena just hates. Even at home she eats with her family, whom hate her most of the time! So despite the awkward moments. Incredibly awkward moments actually. Zelena wouldn't trade them. Ever.

Zelena's last lesson of the day is science. She honestly hates it. Really hates it with a passion. The only hilights being the moments when she once created a formula that singed the fur off her classmate Dorothy Gale's dog Dodo. Or was it Toto? Who cares! Zelena thinks to herself. Wondering if she should 'accidentally' knock dye onto Dorothy's girlfriend. Ruby. Both of them have tormented her actually their whole group, including Mulan and Merida have, why shouldn't she be allowed to get her revenge?

Looking down at her books, Zelena ignores all the whispering around her. It's so obvious they are talking about her. Just grow up! She thinks as she turns a page. Ready to turn around and show them just how wicked she can really be! She ignores those feelings though. It would only bring trouble and more misery to her.

Getting out of her seat to collect more books once their teacher has left the room, she walks with her head held high. She never tries to cower away from the haters. Instead she faces them with confidence and attitude. Except when she returns to her chair and is about to sit it is pulled out from underneath her. Causing her to fall over and hit her head on the desk.

"WHO DID THAT?" She snaps, enraged as she tries to get to her feet. "COME ON THEN? FACE ME!" She snarls as she grabs the desk for support only to be pushed over onto the floor again.

"Watch your step witch. It's slippy around these parts." The voice of her arch enemy Dorothy call cattily to a series of chuckles from the rest of her class. All backing Dorothy. Zelena excepts her to say something else as she prepares her defense. Yet before either of them can speak the teacher waltzes back in. Ignoring the fact that Zelena is on the floor. Ohh yes! Even the teachers hate her! She rolls her eyes in frustration, her head bloody killing her! She scrambles to get to her feet. Yet a hand wraps around her arm, pulling her to her feet. She yanks it away quickly. Who dares to touch her? Why would someone help her up? Emma and Killian are in another class. She wonders angrily as she looks up at the person who helped her up. Blonde hair and bright blue eyes stares her in the face. She recognizes the face as someone who sits in the back of some of her classes. She doesn't know his name. She doesn't really know many people's names at school. Only faces. As since the entire population of the school, minus two people, take great joy in making her life a living hell!

"Are you alright?" He whispers quietly. He talked to her! He dared talk to her? Has Dorothy put him up to this? Zelena wonders to herself as quickly takes her seat.

"I'm fine. What's it to you?" She replies sharply.

"Passing by to get more books. Thought I'd ask the question, considering the fact. You've got one of the books I need." He shrugs boredly. His response makes Zelena want to smirk. Using a kind gesture to steal from her. She notices, realizing that he already has her book!

"Give me that back!" She snaps angrily.

"Your not using it right now." He retorts, she folds her arms.

"I am in fact!" She growls.

"No you're actually not. You're talking to me." He smirks craftily. Zelena falls silent, trying to think of a really cruel comeback. Nothing! She gets absolutely bloody nothing! Who the hell is this person? She wonders as he starts to head back to his desk. No. She thinks, her hands clenching into fists. No one steals from Zelena Mills and gets away with it!

He turns back before she can get there though.

"You know. If you're so in need of this particular book. You could always come and sit beside me?" He smirks. Zelena's blood boils. She gives him a filthy look. About to give him a piece of her mind when the teacher barks at her.

"Zelena Mills! Back to your seat!" She commands her. Zelena returns after a few moments and a threatened detention. In the corner of her eye though she sees that boy. Waving her book around triumphantly. This has got to be some kind of joke! It has to be!

Home time couldn't have arrived fast enough! She ensures that she is out of that door the moment the bell rings. She storms to her car. Ignoring the continuous whispers and the pieces of paper that are thrown at her hair as she makes her way to her car.

Once inside she opens her lunch box, pulling out the ice pack she keeps in there to keep her food cold, placing it against her sore head. Which she had hit when Dorothy pushed her off her seat. A tear escapes her eye. A tear that she very hastily wipes away. Zelena Mills never cries. That's one of the things she is most strongest about. Crying. She doesn't like it and she doesn't do it, however there are moments when things get a little too much for her and the tears threaten to spill! A sudden knock on her car window startles her, making her drop her ice pack. She turns toward the source of the shock. Ready to unleash merry hell on the one poor unfortunate soul who dares to knock and subsequently startle! Zelena. Her rage intensifies when she discovers the person to be the boy who stole her book! She rolls down the window.

"What in hell are you doing? What do you want from me? Here to steal my car this time?" She snaps angrily. He chuckles at her sudden outburst.

"I actually have a car of my own. Unlike your book. I do not require it." He smiles before producing her book from his bag. Zelena's eyes widen in surprise as he passes it to her.

"What. What are you doing?" She whispers.

"Returning your property. I only needed to borrow it! If you had come and sat with me it wouldn't have even left your possession!" He smirks at her wickedly.

"I prefer to sit alone." She retorts.

"I can tell and for your information. I was genuinely curious about your well being after you we're unkindly pushed from your stool." He informs her. Zelena raises her eyebrow, only to wince at the pain in her head and bends down to pick up the ice pack again. She realises that he's still standing outside her car.

"What!" She says sharply, patience thin.

"You're hurt." He comments before moving around to the other side of her car, opening the unlocked door, sliding in beside Zelena.

"What the hell are you doing! When did I say you could get into my car?" She protests.

"You hit your head on that desk. You shouldn't even be driving." He comments, snatching the ice pack from Zelena's hands.

"Ohh bloody hell! Anything else of mine you want to steal from me today? I don't know what you know about me but do know. If you cross me I will make your life here extremely unpleasant and…" Zelena falls silent as he rests the ice pack back over her injury, reaching the sorest part that she couldn't reach before on her own. What the hell is going on? She wonders. This has to be a set up. This has got to be some kind of cruel, very cruel joke.

"I'll drive you home. I'm not about to let you drive yourself like this." He says after a few moments. Zelena laughs.

"I can drive myself home thank you very much! No one drives my car but me!" She says defiantly. He smiles at her, before looking at her with a cold, almost dead. Icy glare.

"I'll drive you home. Zelena." He says her name for the first time. How does he know her name? She wonders. This is a prank, a joke. No doubt about it, but hell! Her head really does throb!

He drives her home. Yes she lets him drive her car. Not wanting to admit that she is very grateful for the lift. He was probably right. She couldn't have driven in her position. However, she does make his life hell during the journey there. Threatening to have him murdered unless he parked her car at least a road away from her house. Not wanting to have to explain that to her family!

"I'll see you tomorrow then. Zelena." He smirks as he says her name. She nods curtly, as she starts to head down the road.

"Hades. My name is Hades. Not that you asked." He calls to her. Now she has a name for the book thief, yet surprisingly decent driver of her car. Hades… Zelena smirks slightly as she disappears around a street corner. Hades is a mystery. A mystery that she knows won't be long before she forgets completely as doubts, once he realises more about her they'll never speak to one another again.

The next day of school is much like the day before except as Zelena walks away from another uncomfortable lunchtime of having to watch Emma and Killian make out again! Hades appears by a locker.

"You know theirs always a spare seat beside me available. Maybe this time." He shoots a glance at Emma and Killian, still passionately making out at Emma's locker!

"You'll accept my offer." He murmurs, moving closer toward her.

"See you in science. Not sure if I have all the correct books today." He mutters in here ear before disappearing down a corridor, leaving Zelena standing there and for the first time in forever. Zelena stands there and smiles…

 **Authors Note: Thank you so much for reading the first one shot I created for my collection. I have never written for Zades before as my OTP is Captain Swan, which is why Emma and Killian do appear in these one shots. but I do really, really love Hades and Zelena's relationship and I hated what they had Zelena do to Hades! As Hades has literally been the best new character the show has had for ages! I may continue with this AU in another connecting one shot. Please tell me what you think. I accept requests for one shots. Thank you again for reading xxxxxxxxxxxxx**


	2. How To Take Care Of Zelena

I don't own anything. All rights go to there respective owners.

 **AU: Everyone Lives! Killian's alive! Hades's alive! Robin's alive! Zades love conquered all the darkness!**

 **How To Take Care Of The Wicked Witch Of The West.**

They had been back in Storybrooke over two weeks. Emma and Killian had barely left one another's side. Seriously! Both Zelena and Regina had joked that Emma was on the verge of handcuffing herself to Killian! To which she had threatened to blast both of them across the room and warned both Gold, Hades and Zelena that if any of them did anything to Killian she would destroy them! However, a rather disgruntled Zelena informed Emma that she didn't actually mind Killian. One of the more effective Dark One's she'd ever seen! She had commented, receiving an eye roll from Emma and a very annoyed Rumple!

Rumple in a matter for fact has not been in Zelena's good books at all. As ever since Hades arrived in Storybrooke it has caused a multitude of problems as he and Gold have been at each others throats every five minutes! One time it got so bad. Emma, Regina and Zelena had had to get involved to separate them! Really! It's evident to Zelena who is more powerful and more fearful and that's her boyfriend! He could take Gold any day! For that Zelena is most certain of!

However, despite the new found happiness Zelena had found with her true love Hades, her daughter, who she has joint custody of with Robin, which was decided after a few heated arguments between Robin, Regina, Zelena and Hades! Them all coming to the agreement that the child should spend equal amounts of times with each parent. Staying with Regina and Robin for one half of the week and Zelena and Hades at the farmhouse (which they had both decided to move into) for the other part of the week. No that happiness abruptly came to an end as The Wicked Witch Of The West abruptly found herself in a rather annoying position!

She hadn't sensed it coming. That may be because she, Zelena. The Wicked Witch Of The West never gets sick. It just never happens and if it does on that one rare occasion. It truly is the evil of this world when Zelena falls sick!

She discovers that she's under the weather early one morning when she wakes up with a blocked nose, a sore throat and a blinding headache!

"Bloody hell!" She moans through the pain, finding her voice incredibly hoarse. No. This can't be happening! She tells herself as she practically falls off her bed. Staggering to the kitchen. Praying to God that Hades has found something to occupy himself with today! She sighs in relief when she sees the kitchen empty. She has to find something to get rid of this terrible curse! She wonders to herself, wondering if her sister has any spells to ease sicknesses? She is about to send herself to her sister when who should appear? But Hades! She groans in both pain and annoyance. This is not what she had wanted to happen! No one should ever be allowed to see her in a state like this. So weak and practically useless! That's not Zelena at all! But before she can just say a quick goodbye Hades fixes her with a worried glance.

"Zelena are you alright?" He asks, reaching out for her. Her grip on the table increases as she knows if she lets go she won't be able to keep herself from falling! She gives him a smile, well she hopes it came across as a smile!

"I'm fine Hade…" She stops mid sentence as her voice croaks and falters. No! If she loses her voice their will be hell to pay with the imbecile who allowed sicknesses like this to form!

"I had too much to drink last night. You know what I'm like!" She lies, trying to master what she hopes looks like a smile. She lies to Hades for two simple reasons. Reason one. She is Zelena. The Wicked Witch Of The West, she does not get sick or succumb to sicknesses. Reason Two. Hades would overreact! He overreacted when he thought she was wounded by Gold and Pan. He would most definitely overreact if he realized that she felt like she'd been dragged through hell and back! Except it appears her lies do not work on Hades as he fixes her a look that very clearly displays. I can see right through your lies!

"Zelena you can barely stand. What's wrong?" He asks, concern and worry evident in his tone of voice.

"I can stand perfectly well thank you very much!" She says with much snark in her voice.

"Let go of the table then." He folds his arms. She fixes him a glare that if looks could kill. Hades would be right back in the Underworld! She obeys though, losing her death like grip on the table.

"See? I'm perfectly fine!" She croaks slightly, taking a small step. A huge mistake she discovers as she completely loses all balance and falls straight into Hades outstretched arms, she grips his arms tightly to stop herself from collapsing. Hades rolls his eyes at her.

"I don't think this counts as 'perfectly fine' Zelena." He comments.

"Ohh aren't you clever!" She snarls sarcastically. He laughs softly, used to Zelena's harsh comments. Moving his hand to stroke her face. Her very hot face, he pushes the long straggly hair out of the way. She fixes him with yet another glare as he rests his hand against her forehead.

"Zelena why didn't you tell me you were unwell?" He asks softly.

"I am not unwell…"

"Zelena you've got a fever that could probably compete with the hottest place in hell! Don't try and tell me that you are not unwell. You don't have to suffer…."

"I am not suffering I am fine! What the hell are you doing put me down!" Zelena protests and Hades ignores her and pulls her into his arms.

"So help me god Hades I will send your sorry arse back to the Underworld if you don't put me down this instant!" She growls angrily, yet doesn't fight against him. Not having the energy to fight a battle she is pretty sure that today, and only today she would lose! He ignores her and carries her back into their bedroom, placing her carefully on their bed.

"No. I will not stand for this!" She growls and moves to get up, despite how comfortable she is lying here. Hades takes her hands in his.

"You will not move from this bed Zelena. If you do I will chain you to it. Do we have an understanding?" He smirks.

"You wouldn't dare!" She hisses. He simply laughs before waving a hand. Zelena looks down and her wrists which now bare two fabric like handcuffs. He bends down to kiss the top of her head.

"Now. I'll be right back." He smiles, before disappearing out of the room. Zelena tugs against the cuffs, sending a burst of her magic at it. Very ineffectively so as her magic practically fizzes out quite quickly. She sighs enraged.

"HADES!"

Chained to her own bed! Zelena lies there boredly, angrily and in such a foul mood she is certain that if she does get out of these restraints she is going to kill Hades, go to the Underworld and kill him again! However, her mood falters slightly when Hades returns with a mug of something that smells great, a new box of tissues, flowers. A lot of flowers! And a box of something that he places on the bedside table.

"What's all that for?" She questions hoarsely. He passes her the drink first. It's warm and really soothes her throat and tastes of something sweet, yet unlike anything she has ever drank before in her life.

"For you." He smiles, sitting on the edge of the bed. Zelena raises an eyebrow at him.

"Haven't you got something to be doing today?" She sighs.

"Yes. Looking after you." He replies.

"I can look after myself Hades." She reminds him.

"I know you can and I am aware that my life in this realm is at risk by daring to care for you but you have got another thing coming if you think I'd ever leave you alone in a state like this." He explains.

"I've been unwell before. No ones ever been there to look after me then. Why should now be any different?" She retorts. He smiles sadly at her before moving closer to her, placing a cool towel to her forehead.

"Because then you didn't have me." He says softly before continuing.

"And now that you have me you never have to face anything alone. Ever Zelena." He says her name gently before eying the box on the table.

"There is chocolates in that you know." He smiles. She looks from him to the box, pulling it immediately onto her lap, smiling when she opens it.

"Hades. I love you!"

Hades sits with her for the rest of the day, making her warm drinks and talking to her throughout the day. It's not easy, looking after the Wicked Witch Of The West. Not easy in the slightest! And there are moments where he does fear for his existence however, he soon finds a way around that by either feeding her or constantly telling her just how much her loves her and eventually when her fever does go down she starts shivering uncontrollably.

"Just magic me another bloody blanket!" She hisses through the two she already has. Hades ignores her though and instead climbs in bed next to her, pulling her into his arms.

"Well this is a good idea isn't it! You're going to get yourself sick!" She mutters, as she wraps her arms around him, burying her face into his chest. He laughs and strokes her hair.

"Anything for you Zelena. Anything for you."

And the next day when both of them cannot face moving from the bed, both being rather laid up. Zelena reminds him that she told him so the day before! However, as both of them lie there unable to move or really say anything. Despite the fact if anyone asked her she'd deny it. She kind of loved Hades looking after her!

 **Authors Note: Thank you so much for reading. Firstly I'd like to say thanks to** **Doe6215** **for the prompt. Zelena getting sick and Hades looking after her. I've really enjoyed writing this one! I have a few more one shots planned and I have planned a continuation to the High School one. However if anyone wants to send me any more requests please do! It may take me a while to write them due to the fact I have been cursed by exams! However I will get around to all of them eventually! Thank you again for reading xxxxxxxxxxx**


	3. Cut (1)

I don't own anything. All rights got to their respective owners.

 **AU: Set after Zelena gives her daughter up and is alone in the farmhouse. WARNING! TRIGGERING CONTENT SELF INJURY! If this subject matter bothers you don't read this.**

 **Cut**

Slamming the door to her hell hole which is the farmhouse. Zelena collapses to the ground in heartbreaking sobs. Her daughter is gone. She's gone and Zelena is very, very doubtful that she will ever see her precious sweetpea again!

This is just what they wanted. Robin and Regina. They wanted to take her baby away from her. This is everything they wanted! Yes they probably didn't want the child's life to be in danger and due to that fact and that fact alone Zelena allowed them to take her. Due to this hell hole, filled with way too much danger for her young, innocent defenceless daughter to face. All because of Hades. However, he wouldn't hurt her baby. He wouldn't do that to her. Would he? He wouldn't harm her daughter. Yes he'd probably take both Robin and Regina out to take the child. Yet he'd return it to her. He would do that wouldn't he? Right now though Zelena really doesn't care! The only thoughts running through her head right now are her daughter. Her beloved daughter who she may never see again.

The first thing the Wicked Witch Of West does is move quite quickly toward the cabinet of drink. Alcohol. Just what she needs right now to calm her. It will calm her. She tells herself as she pulls a glass out. Staring at it for a moment before throwing it across the room, watching it shatter into millions and millions of pieces. Before her hand wraps around the bottle, drinking straight from it. It tastes bitter, a good bitter though that burns and take her mind off all the hell for a moment.

That moments doesn't last long enough though and it isn't long before the bottle is long finished and she's started on her second! Her thoughts returning to her precious baby. She's with Robin now. Robin and Regina. With Regina of all people! Another example that her sister gets everything she can never have. Someone who loves her dearly and a family! Who would ever want a family that includes her? Her mother rejected her so she could be royalty and send her to a family who never cared for her well being! Regina and Robin would never trust her enough to allow her into the family they have created. Face it Zelena! She tells herself. No one will ever love you. You will never have that family you crave. You are destined to be alone for all eternity and that's just the way life is for a wicked villain like you!

Ripping the top off the third bottle Zelena paces the room drunkenly, staggering ever so slightly as she ponders. When she said no one would ever love her. She left out one small detail. Hades… He once said he loved her. He does love her. Well he said he does, he probably doesn't. He's just using her to win her heart so she will kiss him. Allowing his heart to start which subsequently would then allow him him to leave the Underworld behind forever. He wouldn't care about her then and just like everyone else he'd leave her. He'd leave her and as a consequence her soul would honestly and truly be destroyed.

Throwing her empty bottle at the wall Zelena breaks down into more sobs as she collapses to the floor, falling onto the broken shards of glass which slice her legs up. She watches as the blood pours from several wounds on her legs. Remembering something she used to do when she was alone in Oz. When he father would abuse her and mistreat her. It helped then. Ohh it really, really did help then. So why shouldn't it now? She wonders as she wipes her eyes, not caring that mini shards of glass get tangled in her hair as she rubs her head. Not caring in the slightest. She thinks as she heads for the kitchen.

The moment she enters the kitchen she sets to work searching around the room for the sharpest knife. The sharpest the better Zelena believes as she takes the knife in hand from the kitchen counter, moving back into the living room where she sits and slowly slides the knife across her skin, watching with a slight smile as the blood pours out of the wound. She adds another, ignoring the already previously scarred skin. The thousands and thousands of scars that her long sleeves always help cover up. Not right now though. She thinks as she sobs, slicing her wrists as she does so with more power behind it, slicing deep wounds that will remain there forevermore. However, this time she goes deeper then intended. In fact she has never gone this deep before! It doesn't matter though it really doesn't matter… But if she loses too much blood and she dies she is no longer a visitor in the Underworld. She really will never see her precious daughter. No, she'll be fine! She tells herself as she continues to mark her almost porcelain skin. Yet a feeling of tiredness like she's never felt before threatens to overcome her and it's like she can almost feel her heartbeat begin to slow… She hears the door flying open.

"ZELENA!" A voice. The voice of Hades filled with fear, worry, horror, pain yells her name as the knife falls from her hand…

 **Authors Note: Thank you so much for reading again. This idea came to me late at night so sorry if it's terrible! I might do a connecting one shot to this one, tell me if I should continue it and what you thought of this. Thank you so much for reading.**


	4. AU: High School (2) Lunchtime

I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.

 **High School AU: Lunchtime**

Her alarm clock had broken, Zelena had discovered quite late morning when her mother's cruel shouts awaken her abruptly from her slumber. It was completely dead. Dead and gone and after crawling out of bed and onto the landing she discovers that she is quite late and only has a limited amount of time to get ready for school. Bloody brilliant! She thinks as she heads into her bathroom to get ready, ready to face another day of absolute hell!

After quickly scrambling to get ready, throwing on the black tunic she worse yesterday, Zelena races quickly downstairs to the family's kitchen where her younger sister sits, finishing off what looks to be a large plate of delicious breakfast made by there mother, who stands by the cooker, her hands on her hips.

"Is an alarm clock a foreign concept to you Zelena?" She questions in a sharp tone that makes Zelena look down at her feet as she moves toward her mother.

"I'm sorry for my lateness mother. My alarm clock broke unfortunately." She says truthfully. "Grow a brain and set your phone alarm as well sis." Regina mutters from the table. Zelena nods, having only got a new phone the other week she still has not had time to explore its abilities yet. She continues to move toward the stove, looking up at her mother.

"What Zelena?" She asks sharply. Zelena clears her throat before responding.

"Is there any left overs from breakfast?" She asks hopefully.

"No. Regina wanted a second helping and as you weren't here I wasn't going to let fresh food go to waste on a latecomer such as yourself." Her mother responds. Regina nods.

"Yes. It was one of your bests mother." She says before looking down at her phone.

"Robins outside. I better go, I don't want to be late for cheerleading practice before school." Regina beams at their mother before grabbing her bag and heading for the door.

"Regina. Regina!" Mother calls her back, Regina enters with a smile at her lips.

"You forgot your lunch. There's sandwiches, juice, chips and just because it's Friday. A slice of apple pie! Enjoy it my darling!" She wraps her arms around Regina (the favourite child) and waves her off. Only turning her attention back to Zelena when Regina's car pulls out of the drive.

"And what do you think your doing?" She shouts, noticing the knife and pieces of bread in her hand.

"Ohh I was just making my lunch. You haven't already done it for me have you? Because if so I'll have this for breakfast." She asks.

"I most definitely have not! And put those things down right now. You're already late as it is for school. Off you go!" Cora shoos her away from the cooker.

"What am I supposed to eat at lunch? I can just prepare myself a quick sandwich…"

"No Zelena. You need to learn the consequences for your actions! You'll just have to go hungry!"

"Can you just lend me a couple of dollars for a cafeteria meal then? I'll pay you back as soon as I can!" Zelena begs, her stomach already growling from the missed breakfast.

"We're you not listening to me? Have you gone deaf as well as stupid? You have to learn the consequences for your actions!" Her mother snaps. Zelena glares at her before hastily grabbing her school things, pulling her boots on. She's late heading out of the house to her car. Her mother follows her out, but not to wave her off like she did Regina. Ohh no. Zelena gets a different send off.

"And if you do get a late mark this morning for your incompetence. Don't expect any supper for you tonight!" She snaps as Zelena pulls out of her drive, happy to escape her other hell!

Tears come to Zelena's eyes when she receives the late mark she was dreading, knowing her mother will keep to her rule. No supper. No food all day it looks like it. Well it shouldn't really bother her, she tells herself. This happens all the time. She should be used to it by now.

Unfortunately for Zelena she finds it incredibly hard to concentrate throughout her first couple of lesions, the gnawing hunger bothering her by each passing minute. Even Killian and Emma notice during second period.

"You alright?" Killian nudges her. Zelena nods tiredly. He rolls his eyes at Emma and because Zelena believes, they are practically telepathic! Immediately knows what he's thinking.

"What did Cora do this time?" She asks gently. Zelena shrugs.

"Nothing but the usual." She mutters. Killian sighs.

"You know, if you'd let me, I'd give her a piece of my mind for all the hell she puts you through! I mean, and I'm sorry love." He turns to Emma momentarily before continuing.

"Your sister's a bloody witch! She keeps calling me Captain Guyliner just because I prefer to wear eyeliner on a daily basis! Your mother needs to crawl out of her own arse and realise which one of her children is actually the nice one!"

"Killian!" Emma punches him lightly in the arm. Zelena laughs softly.

"I'd pay money to see you do that Killian! But it wouldn't work she'd probably only throw me out onto the streets." Zelena sighs the honest truth.

"So? If that happened you could come and live with me and Emma!" He smirks. Emma nods.

"Yeah, we wouldn't let you be homeless Zelena!" She smiles kindly.

"I doubt my brother has even realised Emma is living with me so he won't mind!" Killian laughs. Emma rolls her eyes at him before kissing him.

"THAT IS THE LAST STRAW! KILLIAN JONES, EMMA SWAN LUNCHTIME DETENTIONS FOR THE NEXT TWO WEEKS AND AFTER SCHOOL! THAT SHALL TEACH YOU FOR YOUR INAPPROPRIATE ACTIONS DURING LESSON TIME!" The teacher bellows from the front of the class, making Emma and Killian jump apart, both blushing madly. Zelena groans and buries her head in her hands. There goes her plan of asking Killian and Emma to share there lunches with her!

When lunchtime does eventually arrive Zelena sits alone in the corner of the cafeteria as without Emma and Killian she has no one to sit by. So she sits in silence, listening to her music until someone walks over to her. She looks up, expecting it to be a classmate ready to throw an offensive comment at her but it's not. It's Hades, the book thief of one month ago. After that faithful day she and Hades had been sharing textbooks in science to the point where he had sometimes chosen to actually dare sit by her so he could read said books and since he had done that she had been less convinced that he'd been put up to it by Dorothy or one of her other enemies.

"Alone are we Zelena?" He questions quietly. Zelena looks at him for a moment before nodding.

"My only two friends are idiots and got themselves placed in detention for two weeks." She states, he laughs softly.

"Ohh my god, what did they do?" He questions with a smirk.

"Made out in class again. I think the teacher finally came to the end of his straw with them." She shrugs, he continues to chuckle.

"I'd love to stay and chat to you Zelena but I must get my lunch." He winks at her and just like that he's gone, leaving Zelena once more with an unexpected smile upon her face.

Turning back to her iPod. Zelena is even more surprised ten minutes later when Hades reappears by her side.

"It seems I don't have anyone to sit with either. Do you mind if I sit by you?" He gestures to the empty seat across from Zelena. She looks up at him ready to tell him to get lost and what is his aim but then she sees just how much food is on his trey. More than just for him, Zelena is silently hoping.

"Do what you like." She replies, he grins widely before sitting himself down, noticing Zelena's gaze upon his food. He laughs again.

"Take whatever you like Zelena." He smiles at her warmly. She looks up at him.

"Yeah. It's okay, go ahead." He urges her on as she reaches forward for the muffin at the edge of his tray, eating it within seconds. Hades laughs.

"What!" She snaps through a mouthful of muffin.

"Nothing! You look like you haven't eaten in weeks!" He smirks as she grabs his chips as well. She is silent to Hades remark.

"Haven't you had any lunch today?" He questions. She looks up at him, he has a concerned look in his eyes. Like he had done when she'd hit her head on that damm table.

"What's it to you?" She snaps.

"You haven't? Why not Zelena!" He asks, his voice sounding momentarily dangerous.

"Because I was late getting up this morning! I missed breakfast and I couldn't make myself any lunch for today but my mother had plenty of time to make my sister breakfast and lunch!" Zelena grumbles hatefully as Hades's eyes widen.

"Your mother made your sister lunch and breakfast but not you? Surely she gave you some money to buy yourself something from the cafeteria. That's what my parents do when I'm late." Hades asks in surprise, Zelena shakes her head in response.

"Nope and get this. If I got a late mark, which I did! I'm banned from having any supper!" She complains. Hades shakes his head in disbelief and anger before pushing the trey closer to Zelena.

"What are you doing?" She asks softly.

"Eat it. Have it all Zelena. I am not going to let you go hungry." He growls.

"But what about you?" She folds her arms.

"Family dinner tonight, my parents make enough food to feed five thousand! I'll be alright." He shrugs his shoulders. Zelena shakes her head.

"No, I can't let you suffer because of me." She sighs. Hades rolls his eyes at her.

"Fine! We'll share it then ok?" He decides.

"Fine!" Zelena snaps as she grabs more food, feeling incredibly grateful towards Hades in this particular moment.

Zelena doesn't see Hades again until the end of the day when she finds him leaning against her car. She glares at him.

"If you mark that you'll suffer." She hisses.

"Ooh I shiver with fear!" He laughs cheekily.

"You should be afraid." She growls in response.

"Yet I'm not Zelena. You're not that fearful towards me." He grins.

"Do you want me to show you just how fearful I can be?" She snarls.

"Maybe at some point but right now I'd like to drive you home. I walked here today you see and I wondered if you'd want me to drive you home again." He smiles.

"You mean you want me to give you a lift?" She folds her arms.

"No. I want to give you a lift."

"It's my car…"

"I know." He smirks at her, she sighs in frustration as she climbs into the passenger seat of her own car.

"You're lucky you're a good driver!"

Once Hades drives her home, Zelena enters her house and is presented with what she already knew was coming. No supper! So in response she storms upstairs and slams the door, staying inside her bedroom for hours and hours until her mother screams at her to open the door, which apparently was knocked upon and clean up her mother and sisters plates from the dinner they ate!

Zelena opens the door first and is surprised to see a picnic basket on the doorstep with a card along with it, her name scrawled across it in beautiful handwriting.

"I told you. My family makes dinners to feed five thousand! Hope this makes you feel better Zelena - Hades x"

Zelena smiles at the note and peers into the basket which is filled to the brim with food. Thanks to Hades it doesn't look like she's going hungry tonight after all!

Because Killian and Emma are doing another lunchtime detention the next school day and because of that reason only! Zelena seeks out Hades again to thank him for the food. He smiles at her and says 'no problem' and offers her a seat. Passing her a small plastic container that contains two home made sandwiches.

"Don't worry Zelena, I'll never let you go hungry again."

 **Authors Note: thank you so much for reading. Some people wanted me to continue with the High School AU so I have done and I have other instalments planed for it to! The next part of Cut is up next though! Thank you all so much for reading xxxx**


	5. Cut (2)

I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.

AU: Set after Zelena gives her daughter up and is alone in the farmhouse. WARNING! TRIGGERING CONTENT SELF INJURY! If this subject matter bothers you don't read this.

 **Cut**

Zelena's eyes snap open. Her head throbs but beside that she is not in any pain anywhere at all. The first thought she has is. Is she dead? Did she actually kill herself? Is she trapped now, in the Underworld forever? She wonders, remembering how deep the cuts went but by the way her heart races within her chest she is pretty sure she is still alive.

Then how did she get out of that mess? She ponders. As she finds, when she looks down at her wrists that the wounds are healed and are now only faint scars, just like the rest of them are. She closes her eyes in defeat. It would have been easier for her to have died. Much easier. No one would have cared and she would have been at peace. She thinks to herself as she attempts to sit up from where she's lying down. Upon her dining room table? She realises as she attempts to sit. A sudden crackling sound fills her ears. Like the sound of a fire crackling and that's when Zelena realises that she is not alone and slowly she turns her head to the right where her eyes fall upon Hades, standing against the wall with his arms folded. His hair alight and his face set into a hard mask. A dark look crossing his face as he glares down at Zelena…

As he takes a step forward toward Zelena his voice is low, dangerous almost.

"What were you thinking?" He asks coldly. Upon looking once at his face Zelena doesn't answer him, yet chooses to stare down at her hands instead.

"Zelena." He says quietly. "What were you thinking?" She decides then to look back up at him, her momentary fear vanishing almost as quickly as it had arrived.

"It helped before," she whispers, her voice raspy and weak from earlier, she is guessing. Hades glares at her again, his hair becoming an even more brighter blue.

"You almost died," he snaps. "That's not helping you." Zelena glares at him then before replying sharply.

"It's not like anyone would care." Hades stares at her for a moment.

"Don't say that," he says fiercely. "I care."

At his words Zelena tries to push away that glimmer of hope welling up in her chest. She doesn't want to give into the idea of believing what Hades says is true, no matter how tempting it is. Instead she ignores him. He is about to say something else when Regina storms into the room, cutting him off before he can even say the words he means to say.

"Zelena? What the hell happened to you! What do you do her you son of a bitch!" She snarls at Hades, who glares at her poisonously.

"You know Regina. I could ask the same thing to you to." He growls before waving his hand taking both him and Zelena far from her farmhouse.

Upon rematerializing, Zelena finds herself lying upon a grand four poster bed in a dark room. Lit only by a couple of candles. Hades room, she believes. Hades stands across from her again. This time with a less furious expression upon his face.

"We need to talk about this Zelena." He says quietly.

"What's there to talk about Hades? What if I don't want to talk about it. I don't see why any of this is any of your business." She folds her arms.

"Yes we do need to talk about this Zelena! And after I found you lying there on the floor seconds from death and I had to heal you with magic so that you'd survive your wounds I think this is my business!" He growls.

"What's it to you Hades, I've told you. This has helped me before. I've never made a mistake like this before as I've never gone that deep. So forget it!" She snaps.

"I'm not just going to forget it Zelena!" He snarls. She sighs, the thin patience that she had now completely gone.

"You want to know why I do what I did? Well Hades it's because of the fact I was abandoned at birth! Because everyone loves my sister yet hates me! Because Regina is always everyone's first choice for everything! Because I may never see my own daughter again! The fact that my daughter is probably going to start calling Regina mum! And because no one in the whole world cares about me and even if they say they do. They don't mean it they are just using me for their own ends!" She cries, only then noticing the tears that are currently streaming down her cheeks. Hades watches as she starts to sob and his anger from earlier abruptly melts away at the sight of the woman he loves crying heartbreakingly in front of him. He closes his eyes momentarily before crossing the room in several strides, sitting beside her on the edge of the bed, cupping both of her cheeks in his hands.

"Zelena, listen to me," Hades says, his tone taking on a pleading note.

"I care about you. I can't lose you." He admits, stroking her tear stained cheeks gently.

"But you don't! No one does Hades!" She cries desperately, more tears falling from her eyes.

"I care Zelena. I care about you so much." He whispers, pulling her closer, pressing his lips to her forehead as he pulls her onto his lap, rocking her gently back and forth as she sobs.

"I always will." He murmurs as she breaks down in his arms and eventually gives in and wraps her arms around Hades, who holds her close in his arms as she cries herself to sleep. Hades sighs as he lies her carefully back down onto the bed, wrapping the blankets around her.

"Because that's how much I love you."

Zelena awakens later that night to the feel of lips against her skin. Her wrists more specifically as she opens her eyes to find Hades gently kissing each scar that marks her skin.

"I. Never. Want. To. See. Any. Of. These. Again. You have no idea how truly frightened I was when I found you lying there." He murmurs in between kisses. Zelena says nothing, she can't promise someone something that she may not be able to keep. She can't promise anything at all but she can do something and she does it, pulling Hades abruptly into her arms, burying her head into his chest as being wrapped up in Hades arms momentarily distracts her from the knife.

 **Authors Note: thank's for reading. I hope you all liked this. I would like to say a massive thanks to** **FangirlSupreme** **, whom without I never would have been able to write this chapter as most of this chapter is thanks to the brilliance of FangirlSupreme! Thank you so much! Again thank you all for reading, see you next one shot xxxxx**


	6. AU: High School (3) Rain

I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.

 **High School AU: Rain**

It's raining. It's bloody raining and today is the day Zelena has to walk half an hour to get to school! Yes she has a car and yes that car works! However, her sisters doesn't work and that is the cause of the argument this morning!

She had just gotten ready for school. Making sure she is awake half an hour earlier to allow time to eat breakfast. Lunch doesn't matter any more as ever since two weeks ago. Zelena has always managed to eat her lunch as she has been supplied everyday since that Friday two weeks ago with a set of sandwiches Hades brings for her.

However, upon getting to the kitchen Regina storms in after her. Looking at their mother with a pouty look upon her face.

"Mom! My car won't start. I think it's broken." She whines. Their Mother of course moving to wrap her arms around Regina before turning once to Zelena.

"Doesn't matter. I'll have it fixed today. You can take Zelena's car." She has revealed.

"But I need my car to get myself to school." She had protested.

"Well you can just walk. If you set off now you should be able to make it." She commands.

"But it's raining! Why can't Regina walk? Why should I give up my car for her!" Zelena cried.

"Zelena Mills! Does the words family, love and respect not mean anything to you? Yes? Well if it does then work it out!" She had snapped at her.

"Ring Robin he has a car!" Zelena had yelled, reminding her sister of the boyfriend she always seems to have her tongue shoved down his throat!

"Robin's phone broke yesterday. Silly accident. No can do I'm afraid, your car is all I have. I'd give you a lift of course, but because of Robin's 'unfortunate' accident. He isn't allowed to drive his car either! Go on sis. You'll get a late mark if you don't head off right now and remember the rule! No supper if you get a late mark!" She says before bursting into reams of laughter to which their mother joins in with, both of them still cackling like witches when Zelena walks out into the rain and slams the door behind her.

So that's what happened! Another typical day in the life of the Mills Family! Only five minutes of her journey has already passed and she's already soaked through! She hates that she had to give her car up for her sister and she hates her mother even more for making her do that! The sound of a horn honking abruptly pulls her out of her thoughts and she looks up to see her own car sailing past.

"Thanks for the ride sis!" Regina laughs as she deliberately drives through a puddle, soaking Zelena from head to toe. Zelena hisses, yet knows she can't do anything and instead fights against the tears she feels coming, wiping at her eyes ferociously, which only seems to make the tears worse and she bites down hard on her lip as she continues to walk. Another honking sound pulls her out of her thoughts again. She expects it to be one of her classmates. Someone who's either going to throw something at her or throw a nasty comment her way so she doesn't even acknowledge the sound before the horn rings out again.

"Zelena!" A voice calls. Hades's voice. She looks up at that, realizing then that the car in fact belongs to Hades and he has rolled down his window to talk to her.

"Hello Hades." She tries to give him a confident smile. Put up the façade that she is so used to using.

"Now don't argue with me. It's raining. Get in!" He commands. Zelena sniffs before smirking.

"What if I like walking in the rain? Didn't you think of that one Hades?" She questions jokingly. He rolls his eyes at her in a way that suggests. I see right through your playful bullshit as he leans over to unlock the door.

"Zelena. Get in."

"So where's your car then?" He questions once Zelena is inside the vehicle and Hades has put the heater on.

"With dear sis!" Zelena mutters sarcastically. Hades raises an eyebrow.

"Why has your sister got your car? Hasn't she got one of her own?" He questions curiously.

"Ohh she does. Her convertible! Yeah she has a car, except her's broke down this morning so automatically I had to give her mine! Because apparently since her boyfriend Robin was also unable to drive her to school I had to give her my car because of course Regina cannot be allowed to walk to school in the rain ohh no! But Zelena, who actually has her own car has to walk half an hour through the rain to get to school! Yeah it makes a lot of sense doesn't it!" Zelena snaps angrily. Hades shakes his head in disbelief and disgust at how Zelena's family have treated her again. They shouldn't be allowed to get away with this… He thinks to himself as he turns to Zelena.

"Zelena listen to me. Ignore them. If this ever happens again, just wait until I drive by, I won't let you walk in the rain." He smiles as he parks the car. Zelena moaning as the heat switches off.

"Still cold?" He questions before lightly touching her hand, Zelena flinches at the abrupt touch yet doesn't complain when Hades takes her hands in his and holds them until they are warm. She pulls away quickly afterwards though, unnerved slightly by the contact between her and Hades. A silence falls between them momentarily.

"Thank you for the ride Hades." Zelena murmurs. He smirks at her as she climbs out.

"Anytime Zelena. Anytime." He smiles as she disappears from view. He rolls down the window soon after.

"Ohh and I'll see you at lunchtime!" He calls after her.

"Will you now?" She responds as she walks away. Of course you will! she thinks as she walks to her first class.

Zelena finds her classes incredibly slow today. Slow and aggravating as in her first two classes she had something stuck to her chair. Her third class she had her chair pulled out from beneath her and her forth and final class before lunchtime she was subjected to the usual childish name calling and having things thrown at her and finds herself actually praying for lunchtime to arrive!

Killian and Emma's final lunchtime detention is today so starting from Monday she'll be able to sit with them again as she has been sitting with Hades ever since he came to her the first time as she is certain that he won't want to sit by her once he realises he doesn't have to anymore, she thinks to herself as the bell is finally rung! She makes sure she's the first out of the class and almost has a heart attack when she runs into Hades, who is standing outside of the door. He grips her arms gently. She looks at him in shock.

"Hades, what are you doing here?" She asks in surprise.

"Waiting for you. I remembered you saying what you had before lunch so I thought I'd grab you before hand." He smiles. She shakes her head in disbelief.

"Shall we?" He questions.

"Let's." Zelena nods as they head for lunch together.

After lunch has been consumed. Hades and Zelena sit facing one another as they talk to each other about their school day so far, something that had become a routine now for the last two weeks.

"What are you doing after school?" Zelena asks curiously. Hades grins.

"Why? Do you want me for something?" He grins wider.

"No! You always ask me what I'm doing after school I thought that I should turn the tables a bit." She folds her arms.

"I actually have a family event. Quite a large family reunion…"

"One that I shall be driving us all to." A man walks up behind Hades, who sighs in frustration.

"Zeus." He mutters.

"Brother! Is this the chick you were apparently seen driving to school this morning?" He indicates to Zelena. So this is Hades's famous brother Zeus. Zelena has heard of him many times actually met him, one of her many tormentors she remembers well.

"Yes. Zelena, my brother Zeus. Zeus, Zelena." Hades murmurs.

"Ohh we've met. I didn't know you were friends with the wicked witch brother?" Zeus questions. Hades is quiet, before standing and turning to face his brother. Without even thinking, Zelena stands to and moves to Hades's side for no apparent reason. Even she doesn't understand why she does it. The whole cafeteria, upon seeing this, all fall silent and look curiously at Hades and Zeus.

"Didn't you get the message, I'm driving to the event. Mother mentioned it this morning." Hades growls.

"Are you sure Hades? I thought it was cleared last night. I was driving the family to the event." Zeus continues to smirk.

"Why does it matter if I drive the family to the event?" Hades questions.

"I'm concerned that if you drive, well…" Zeus winces.

"What." Hades replies quietly.

"Well I'm worried about the fallout. I mean it's the whole family in the car and well how do I put this."

"Just say it Zeus." Hades folds his arms.

"I'm a better driver than you. I was a more efficient learner than you. I didn't destroy grandmas lawn and garden gnome collection and I fear that it will jeopardise our newly found friendship if you are allowed to drive the folks to the event."

"Because you're better than me?" Hades laughs.

"Yes." Zeus replies in a matter of fact manner.

"And you think you'd beat me?" He challenges

"Yes." Zeus states calmly

"Let me tell you something Zeus. You can't possibly overestimate how much you underestimate me and if your under the impression that you'll overwhelm me with your little stunts in front of our family. Understand this, I'm not your underling in there. You have nothing over me and under the heading of…"

"Hades there are just far to many overs and unders going on here. My point is this. I'm the better driver in the family not you and the family would probably feel more comfortable with me driving us all to the event. However, if you want to prove yourself then I'm all up for a little, what do you call it. Competition with you to determine whose the better driver then…"

"A race?" Hades smirks a spark igniting in his eyes.

"Yes." Zeus smirks back with equal mischievousness

"Hey Zeus. May the best man win." Hades takes a step towards Zeus.

"So you agree?" Zeus sniggers with extra mischief.

"You really are quite arrogant aren't you?" Hades stares

"I object to your crude comments as my arrogance is simply anticipatory it coincides with the prospect of certain victory." Zeus comments.

"I promise. whatever happens, I won't let it affect our newly found friendship" Hades mutters, his voice laced with sarcasm.

"Fine." Zeus snaps

"Fine." Hades replies.

"Outside in five minutes brother." Zeus smirks as he heads for the door, practically the whole cafeteria following him. Zelena turns to Hades.

"You're not actually going to race him are you?" She asks incredulously.

"What did I say Zelena? May the best man win and the best man is me."

It's still raining when Zeus and Hades climb into their individual vehicles. A clap of thunder and lighting sends shivers down Zelena's spine as she approaches Hades window.

"Hades the weather…" She starts.

"Zelena. This needs to be resolved." He states as he turns to Zeus's car.

"Someone want to time us?" Zeus calls to practically the whole school, who are outside waiting to see the 'brother off'

"May the best man win." Hades smirks and then they are off, speeding into the distance with the speed of light. Everyone cheering them on, even Zelena stands there with a smirk as she sees Hades car slightly in the distance, ahead of his brother. That absolute arsehole! Zelena thinks as a clap of thunder happens over head yet before the lightning strikes there is another sound, the sound of squealing tires and then a sickening crash, followed by screams of students…

 **Authors Note: sorry if this latest instalment was terrible this idea came to me late at night. Thank you all so much for reading x see you next one shot xxxxxxx**


	7. Hades Vs Technology

I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.

 **AU: Everyone Lives!**

 **Hades VS Technology**

They had been living in Storybrooke for three months now. Three months with no incident. Yes, alright there had been some Jekyll and Hyde thing but that had been resolved thanks to the heroes, even Gold and Hades had put their differences aside to help defeat the evil they had faced but now for once, everything is peaceful and there's no danger, besides Gold and Hades occasionally fighting each other of course! And a slight incident that had almost ended in Killian and Gold ending their truce, which Hades had actually resolved without any of their women in their lives learning about it! As that really would have been a disaster!

It's a normal Wednesday morning in Storybrooke however, Hades is pissed. Really pissed. Part of the reason is because Zelena is gone for the whole day, spending time with her daughter with Robin and Regina. Hades had not been invited to that. Well at least Zelena had wanted him there! Robin and Regina though had strictly banned it as they still don't trust Hades, even now after three very long months! At first he was rather angry and a few things had accidentally got set on fire but after a while and some convincing, okay a lot of convincing from Zelena! He had decided bygones to the matter!

The other thing that annoyed him and this really was the source of his rage is this stupid, idiotic thing! That Zelena had gifted him with this morning! He glares at it just thinking about it. Now this morning when Zelena had said that she had a 'surprise' for him to cheer him up whilst she was gone he had been thinking of a very different surprise to what it actually was! And what it was that Zelena had 'gifted' him with is this very strange, very complicated, idiotic, stupid! Magical object that, apparently, according to Zelena, is called an 'mobile phone'! First thought had been what. Second, after she had switched it on for him (he thinks that's what she did!) What useless sorcery is this!

Sitting, glaring at the offending object in his hand that appears to be counting up to something. Hades is about ready to set it on fire, yet he had promised Zelena he would try and use it. Even if he wanted to kill it and can see no purpose to it and as to why it would cheer him up. A quiet laugh behind him startles him. He turns around with a glare upon his face. The Saviour, Emma Swan stands there smiling at him.

"I've seen that look before. Zelena introduced you to modern technology?" She questions.

"That's what it is?" Hades growls, taking a swig from his second glass of wine today.

"Yeah. You look like Killian did when I gave him his first phone." She smiles.

"So you know how to work this abomination?" He growls. She nods.

"I do. Zelena told you nothing?" She asks. He sighs.

"No. It was like she wanted to see me suffer! And she said that it would 'cheer me up' I honestly haven't felt this murderous since I left the Underworld!" He snaps. Emma frowns and looks down at Hades's phone, stifling a laugh.

"Hades you've locked yourself out of your own phone for about half an hour!" She winces.

"Didn't Zelena give you a series of numbers?" She asks. Hades sighs. She did in fact.

"I didn't realise that was important." He growls. She nods.

"It kind of is. Look I'll show you how to get into it and change the passcode to something you'll remember." She sighs, sitting down beside him.

"Drink?" He offers. She shakes her head.

"Can't drink anymore." She groans. He nods.

"Ahh yes! Zelena told me that you are expecting a child with the Pirate."

"Killian!" She mutters as she takes the phone from him.

"Didn't think you pair left each others side at all anymore." He questions.

"Yeah I left him with the car however he'll probably be…"

"Swan! Bloody hell I was getting worried about you." Killian appears behind her.

"I'm alright. Zelena left Hades with a new phone. It's like you all over again!" She smirks. Killian shudders, taking a seat.

"Bloody awful devices at first. Lesson for you mate, if a button appears that says 'Zelena' answer it." He explains. Emma rolls her eyes at him, taking his hand in hers.

"I'm in! Right this scrolls down to show missed messages. You've got loads…" She passes the phone back to Hades who looks back at the offending device. Yet this time it shows messages from Zelena…

Zelena: Are you okay? Is it working.

Many other messages that look like that and several photos of his Zelena holding her daughter with a sentence underneath it.

Missing you x love you loads xxx

Hades smiles as he sees them, turning momentarily back to Emma and Killian.

"Now what the hell do I do?"

"See you Friday my sweetpea." Zelena blows a kiss to her daughter in her sisters arms as she turns to head back to her farmhouse. Hopefully to Hades, dinner, a nice long bath and other pleasurable activities!

Her phones pings as she is nearing it. Hades! Finally a reply! She'd been waiting for this all day. She had set the phone up for him so he wouldn't have to bother with that but he hasn't contacted her all day! She opens the attachment she gets to reveal a picture of Hades, Emma and Hook. She stifles a laugh, wondering what could have happened between Hades and his new phone which caused him to ask for help from Emma and Hook! She'll find out soon enough though, she thinks to herself as she practically skips to her front door.

"Hades?" She calls softly as she enters their place.

"Zelena." His voice comes from behind her, she is about to say something when he wraps his arms around her waist from behind and practically drags her toward their sofa, pulling her down so she's sitting on his lap.

"I really missed you today. I'm sorry that you couldn't have been with me. It's going to take dear old sis and Robin a bit longer then I thought to get used to you." She sighs.

"Bygones." He murmurs, trailing kisses down the side of her neck. She smirks approvingly.

"I know you missed me. I got the message, several times." He explains. She smiles more.

"How did you find the phone?" She sighs as his hands move to her hips.

"Well I locked myself out of it apparently which is why I couldn't get back to you sooner. Miss Swan and her pirate showed me how to get into it and how to reply to you." He explains. Zelena groans.

"Sorry. I assumed there were mobile phones in the Underworld." She sighs, kissing his cheek as if to try and make up for the horror he faced with that phone.

"It may have looked like Storybrooke but the technology was as good as Oz! And I cannot remember ever facing a hellish beast such as a mobile phone there!" He smiles. She rolls her eyes at him.

"Computers are next on the list. Probably Snapchat next though, there's some great filters that make you look like your on fire!" She laughs. This time it's Hades who rolls his eyes at her, before kissing the love of his life, pulling her into his arms.

"Enough confusion for me for one day I think!" He smirks as he carries her back towards their bedroom…

Several hours later when Zelena is curled up besides her beloved she remembers something.

"Actually next will have to be Netflix's now that is…"

"Zelena!" Hades groans and she doesn't get to finish her sentence…

 **Authors Note: Thank you all so much for reading and to Doe6215 for the prompt. Hades getting introduced to modern technology. Not sure when next one shot will be up as my exams are cursing me right now, yet my next High School AU should be up soon when I've figured out the ending for chapter! Thanks again for reading xxxxxxxxxxxxx**


	8. AU: High School (4) The Family Reunion

I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.

 **High School AU: The Family Reunion**

The roads had been too slippy. That's what the cops said. That and because they both were going ridiculously fast because they were racing. They were bloody racing for something as unimportant as deciding who was driving their family to a family reunion which neither of them actually probably wanted to attend! They were racing and because of the roads being slippy and the distraction of thunder and lightening. One drove into a tree and the other's car was hit by the same tree when it eventually collapsed…

Zelena races across the school parking lot, away from the crowds of students, teachers, cops and the reporters, who had arrived due to the commotion. It's raining again and the rain only reminds her that she doesn't have her car. She needs a car! Because she needs to get to the hospital which was where Hades was taken. Hades had been in front and Zeus had made him swerve into a tree. The only constellation was that when the tree collapsed it had fallen onto Zeus! However, both of them have been rushed to hospital. Their conditions unknown but by the looks of things and the things Zelena had heard when the crash happened and she joined the group of students running to get to the scene of the accident. It didn't sound good.

Doing something she knows she'll regret later and probably have the bollocking of her life for. Zelena races for Killian's car. The only person she knows who keeps a spare set of car keys in compartment in his car. However, to get to said car keys she needs a way into his car.

"Sorry Killian." She murmurs to herself as she picks the lock of his car with a few of her hair pins, letting her hair lose from its bun.

It takes a couple of minutes to do so but when she's done she is then able to grab his spare set of keys and escape from school to go and find her 'acquaintance'!

It doesn't take her very long to reach the hospital. Not long at all! And she pretends not to feel relieved when a nurse directs her to Hades room as from the calm atmosphere it appears as if the accident wasn't as severe as it looked!

Tentatively, Zelena pops her head around the side of the door. Breathing in a sort of sign of relief as she sees Hades, sitting up and looking dreadfully bored! He's alright. She thinks, he wasn't killed in that foolish accident! Before glaring at the door, marching inside angrily, ready to rip him a new one!

"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL WERE YOU PLAYING AT?" She seethes as she enters the room. Hades looks over at her, a smile crossing his face. A smirk even! After what he's just done how dare he smirk at her! She thinks.

"Zelena." He sighs softly before wincing in pain. Zelena notices.

"How bad?" She growls.

"Zelena..." He starts. She glares at him.

"How badly are you hurt!" She snaps. He sighs.

"Broken arm couple of broken fingers and ribs. Other then that I'm fine!" He smirks at her.

"Will you stop smirking at me! This is serious Hades it was a serious action. Despite the fact I honestly don't care, is your brother in a similar position?" She questions.

"Zeus? Ohh about the same! He broke his leg. In fact he 'unfortunately' suffered injuries to his face, unlike myself. All my good looks are still perfectly intact." He grins. Zelena shakes her head in annoyance and anger.

"How can you joke about this!" She snarls. He smiles at her.

"Because I can and it wasn't that bad Zelena! And there is the fact that technically I won! I was in front and because of my brothers horrific driving abilities he ended up slamming into the back of me! So in all I am sort of victorious! Also, I never wanted to go to this stupid reunion thing in the first place and now I don't have to! Because, well there is a lot of us anyway, I'm sure they won't miss us! In fact the only downside is that my brother did not get put in a medically induced coma!" He grins again with such a smug look on his face.

"Keep this up and I'll break your other arm!" Zelena hisses at him. He laughs.

"Is that concern I detect Zelena? Question for you. How did you get here so fast? I must have really frightened you because you…"

"HADES! That doesn't matter and I'm not concerned. I'm more in disbelief at your pure stupidity! I mean if you had died who would have driven me to school when my sister decides to steal my car?" She shouts. Hades laughs.

"So your not concerned at all?" He smirks, Zelena shakes her head.

"No. Not at all!" She growls. He laughs again.

"Zelena if you truly are not concerned about me then why are you about to break my other hand?" He laughs, abruptly making Zelena realise that she has been holding his good hand the whole time she's been here! She yanks her hand away instantly. What the hell? She thinks to herself as Hades continues to smirk at her.

"Come on admit it! You were worried about me." He laughs. Zelena narrows her eyes at him.

"Well what do you think Hades? You're the only friend I've got who doesn't land themselves in detention all the time!" She cries, instantly wanting to slap herself for using the 'friend' word! Suppose she better get the rest out, she thinks to herself as she actually takes his hand again.

"Don't leave me alone." She whispers. He smiles at her.

"Zelena..."

"HADES! WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING? YOU AND YOUR BROTHER COULD HAVE BEEN KILLED!" Comes a series of angry voices from the door. Zelena looks at Hades as it doesn't take a genius to work out that the people are his family. Zelena smirks, hoping that they will rip him a new one as well for his careless, careless stupidity!

"YOU ARE SO LUCKY TO BE ALIVE YOUNG MAN YOU KNOW THAT? Now who's this?" A female voice questions as she moves to the other side of Hades. Zelena takes this as her cue to leave. Yet Hades grips her hand tighter.

"Mother. This is my friend Zelena." He introduces her. Zelena glares at him, still contemplating whether or not she should kill him! As what on earth as he dropped her in now?

"Zelena? I've heard the name from Zeus before…" His mother ponders.

"Whatever he told you is probably a lie. He doesn't know her. He doesn't know her at all." Hades murmurs, causing Zelena to smile a little bit.

"It doesn't matter right now. What matters is the fact you and your brother were racing each other? That's what caused all this am I right and resulted in both of you being severely injured and both of your cars being totaled!" She snarls, with probably more anger than Zelena had shown.

"Well Zeus did…"

"I've gotten a full account from Zeus and your father is with him now! Apparently this was all your idea! Really Hades you are getting far too old to be acting so immaturely!" She snaps before continuing.

"And I know what your were arguing about and it was ridiculous! You were the one going to drive us all along as Zeus really is the more sociable one in the family! And you can wipe that smirk of your face right now young man as I know you probably think you have gotten out of the family reunion but I can tell you this now. Your father is presently getting you and your brother discharged! You are going to the reunion, you are going to be sociable and you are grounded!" She snaps. Zelena tries not to laugh as the smirk disappears from Hades's face. He notices immediately.

"Now I would like you to think to yourself. Was it all worth it as nothing has changed except the fact that neither of you are driving and the fact that I or your father is going to have to do the driving and he is furious with you as it is!" She folds her arms. He nods.

"I actually have a solution to that. Because I actually brought her to school as she has no car. Zelena could drive us. Just a thought there." He grins. She glowers at him, hoping his mother realizes that this is a joke!

"What a wonderful idea! Think that if you had applied that kind of smarts today you wouldn't be in this mess!" She growls as she heads towards the door. Hades laughs as she goes as Zelena gives him a look so deadly that if looks could kill he would be dead two times over!

"Hades I am going to kill you!"

Hades and Zeus are released within the hour, Zeus confined to a wheelchair, groaning and swearing. Hades, gritting his teeth and trying to ignore the pain as he walks towards the car his good arm linked with Zelena's for support as he walks gingerly towards the car. However, it doesn't stop his commenting.

"Just to put this out there brother. I won." He smirks.

"Brother. Don't even go there." Zeus growls. Hades continues to smirk as they approach the car.

"It appears the best man bested you!"

It is only half way there to Hades's bloody family event when Zelena remembers that she stole Killian's car and that it is still on the Hospital car park! She actually hasn't looked at her phone, having switched it off but she's expecting there's messages from Killian and probably her mother. In fact her mother will probably be furious that she isn't at home at the time she is expected, which is when school ends but honestly, right now. Zelena just doesn't care! At the moment all she cares about is the fact Hades may suffer another 'unfortunate accident' before the night is out!

When Hades had said that there 'is a lot' of family members, Zelena had not expected to see probably over fifty people crowded around a humongous table that could probably stretch the length of two great halls! Zelena glares at Hades.

"You. Owe. Me. Big. Time."

The dinner in itself is ok. Probably the best dinner Zelena has had in years, something she is sure Hades, who sat next to her through the whole dinner, had guessed! However, after the dinner is the socializing! Ohh yes. Hades really is going to suffer!

"And this Zelena is why I hate family reunions." Hades mumbles in her ear after they finishes a conversation with one of his many relatives. She has walked around arm in arm with Hades to help him walk as she is certain he must be in so much pain but he never says a word. Just occasionally curses, winces and murmurs in pain. His and Zeus's accident has actually been the main topic of conversation this evening. No surprise there, Zelena thinks as Hades navigates them towards where his parents, Zeus and a large group of his relatives are when his mother beckons him over.

"This is Hades's friend Zelena." His mother explains.

"Yes. Zelena Mills. The real Wicked Witch…Crap!" Zeus cries as Hades 'accidentally' kicks his break, making his wheelchair zoom backwards. Zelena chuckles and Hades tightens his grip on Zelena's arm.

"Hades!" His mother hisses. A man, who looks to be his father glares at him as well.

"What your brother was going to say was valid. I have heard of your new 'friend's wicked ways and…"

"Sorry father. Thought this was a family reunion, not a trial." Hades growls.

"Mills? You don't happen to be a relation to Cora Mills?" A man asks abruptly, fortunately cutting off what could have been a dispute between Hades and his father.

"I'm her eldest daughter." Zelena murmurs.

"Impossible, I've met Cora Mills, she only has one daughter. Regina. That's what she told me anyway!" Hades's father comments. Zelena sighs, she's used to this. Her mother never tells anyone she has two daughters, only one. Regina as per bloody usual! Zelena snaps out of her head instantly though as Hades slides his good arm around her waist. What the hell is he doing? She thinks, yet she realises after a moment that he is trying to comfort her.

"So how long have you pair been dating?" A girl chirps.

"Aunt Aphrodite!" Hades groans.

"What you're not dating?" His aunt cries.

"No Zelena's my. My friend." Hades declares. Zelena smiles, like she had done when Killian and Emma had said she was there friend. Hades considers her as his friend and despite the fact she'd deny it if anyone ever asked. She'd count him as her friend to!

"So this accident was caused because of their rocky relationship? How do you cope with them living together on a daily basis?" Another relative questions Hades and Zeus's accident.

"Well they don't. Hades in fact decided to make a rather mature suggestion over nearly two years ago now. To stop the constant confrontations between him and his brother he chose to covert our garage at the back of the garden into a one story home for himself. Just came to us one day and said that's what he's going to do. Here's the money!" His mother explains. Zelena's eyes widen at the fact Hades practically lives alone and looks over at him. He nods to confirm it.

"However he does still eat with us. I drew the line at him having his own kitchen in there and there's only one way in to his small place so he cannot have various women up there, like his brother had cleverly made the concern." His father adds. Again Zelena looks over at Hades, who smirks.

"That's what they like to think!"

It is midnight when Zelena arrives back at home. Her own personal hell after what had turned out to be a rather pleasant night. Hades walks her, well walks with her help to the bottom of her drive to say goodnight.

"Not bad. Wasn't the worst thing I have ever been dragged to." She says once they are facing one another. Hades smiles.

"I'm sorry about what various members of my family said. I will address that with them before I retire to my place." He sighs.

"You really live in the back garden?" Zelena laughs.

"In a nicely converted garage. Yes I do." He replies.

"I'd love that." Zelena murmurs.

"You're always welcome to visit, if things get too hectic here. I meant what I said earlier, there is more than one way in." He grins before smirking.

"You never did tell me how you got to me so quickly earlier." Zelena signs in response.

"You really want to know? I stole my best friends car and left it in the hospital parking lot." She smirks, her thoughts abruptly going to Killian and the fact that he is probably bloody furious right now. She'll just have to find out later, she thinks. He laughs.

"You stole your best friends car for me? Wow Zelena, you were worried about me." He smirks.

"I was." She admits before remembering something.

"You were going to say something earlier in the hospital. What was it?" She asks yet before he can respond in the distance, Zelena's porch light flickers on.

"You better go. Go now, it will take you longer since your hurt…" She trails off, thinking again of how much pain he must be in. Yet just as she thinks he is about to turn away from her he places his hand carefully against her cheek. She freezes at his abrupt touch.

"Thank you Zelena. For all you have done for me today." He murmurs.

"It was nothing." She replies. He changes the subject instantly.

"Think of the offer Zelena. Your more than welcome to visit. Especially since…" He eyes her front door which is beginning to open. He starts to walk away.

"Hades!" She calls him back.

"Zelena?" He replies as she walks briskly over to him so they are face to face.

"If you ever scare me like that again. I'll kill you." She growls. Hades laughs.

"That a girl! Goodnight Zelena." He smiles before disappearing into the night. Zelena smiles after him, turning back toward her house where her mother is marching across the pathway.

"Where the hell have you been?" She snarls.

"Hello mother. Nice to see you to!" Zelena sighs.

"Get inside now!" Cora spits. Zelena moans.

"Look I'm sorry I've been gone for so long. I didn't mean to cause any worry. A friend of…" Zelena is abruptly cut off by a sharp stinging sensation to her face as her mother slaps her hard across the face, her long talon like nails catching her lip, making it bleed.

"I'll teach you a lesson for showing up this late at night with no explanation as to where you've been all day!" She snarls before grabbing Zelena's wrist in a iron like grip as she pushes her inside.

"NOW GET INSIDE YOU LITTLE WITCH!"

 **Authors Note: This chapter couldn't have been possible without the wonderful** **FangirlSupreme** **. Thank you so much for your ideas and constant support it means the world to me and thank you all for reading. Next one shot may take a while because of A. Exams and B. Because I have no ideas! Please tell me what you think x thank you again for reading xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**


	9. Disney's Hercules

I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.

 **AU: Domesticated Zades**

 **Disney's Hercules**

"What is that behind your back?" Hades questions as Zelena walks into their living room, seconds after a conversation at the door with Regina and Henry.

"A gift from my nephew." She says, trying not to smirk as she places the DVD in the machine.

"After the last gift. I am assuming it's a film?" Hades questions, remembering fondly the last two times Henry had decided to gift both Zelena and Hades. The first gift had been 101 Dalmatians. Zelena and Hades had both enjoyed it immensely and had Hades wishing he could just pop down to the Underworld just so he could show it to Cruella De Vil! The similarities had been uncanny!

The second gift from Henry was another Disney movie and it had been The Hunchback Of Notre Dame. A film that Hades had taken a great liking to, something which Zelena had not enjoyed as much, not saying she didn't like it though as Hades had frequently caught her singing 'Out There' around the house and to her daughter once! Yet still, despite her love for the song it wasn't a favorite of hers and she had been complaining to Henry about due to the effect it had, had on Hades. As for the full two weeks after watching the film Hades had been singing non stop his new favorite song. Hellfire!

This is why Hades is certain that whatever Zelena had received from Henry is another movie for them both to watch. To annoy Zelena, he attempts to make a guess.

"Is it The Hunchback Of Notre Dame 2?" He grins hopefully.

"No. I told Henry that you could watch that one with him!" Zelena says firmly.

"What is it then?" He questions, already mentally singing Hellfire in his head!

"You'll find out." She smirks mischievously as she plonks herself onto the couch beside him as the menu appears.

"Hercules! There's a movie called Hercules?" Hades cries in outrage. Zelena chuckles.

"Yes Henry said it was one of the best in his opinion." She smiles, moving to cuddle up beside Hades, who glares at the screen as Zelena clicks play!

"WHAT IN GODS NAME WAS THAT?" Hades explodes after the credits are rolling. Zelena laughs at Hades's outburst and tries not to roll of the couch.

"I thought it was quite accurate!" She laughs.

"ACCURATE? ACCURATE! Are you kidding me! That was utter garbage! For one my nephew does not look anything like that and he certainly doesn't glow orange! Two. I never employed that Megera girl! I wouldn't have needed her to take out my spineless excuse of a nephew! And that wasn't even a true portrayal of her! She needed Captain Hook to help her escape a prison! I can't remember her ever being headstrong and heroic! And the Underworld looks nothing like that! And my hair does not go red when I'm angry and I am certainly not grey! Did whoever make this abomination think I had some kind of problem or something. Or is my brother behind this! I bet he had a say in the making of that monstrosity! What a complete waste of my time!" Hades growls, folding his arms sulkily, his hair flickering blue with his rage. Zelena laughs once more before placing a kiss to his lips.

"Not helping." He mutters moodily.

"I for one liked it because I like that song Megera sang and the Muses." She comments.

"I remember breaking that vase when I was seven years old." Hades sniggers.

"I really enjoyed it but their version of Hades is nothing compared to the real one who I love." She smiles. Hades sighs and kisses her back.

"He didn't even get a villain song!" He mutters. Zelena laughs as she sits in his lap, kissing him passionately.

"Maybe I can take your mind off it." She smiles, he sighs and picks her up in response.

"Yes. Now that is a good idea!"

Much later that night when Zelena is wrapped comfortably in Hades's arms he leans over to her and mutters.

"Your pick next. The Hunchback Of Notre Dame 2 or The Wizard Of Oz?" It isn't until she smacks him that he stops laughing!

 **Authors Note: Thank you so much for reading this. The thought of Hades watching Disney's Hercules was just too good to pass up, hence this story and because I love the Disney Hercules! Thank you for reading again x please tell me what you thought. I'll try to update soon x**


	10. Ally McBeal

**I don't own anything. All rights go to their respective owners.**

 **AU: Ally McBeal**

Collapsing on the couch after a long day with her beloved daughter, Zelena switches on the TV. She flicks through the shows absentmindedly until she finds something she likes, the sound of the door slamming shut distracting her momentarily.

"Hades?" she calls softly, hoping that it's him and not her sister.

"Zelena," he replies, sounding just about as tired as she is.

"Long day?" she queries knowingly.

"You could say that. If the curse of the Dark One didn't exist. Gold would be rotting in hell about now," he grumbles moodily as he collapses on the sofa beside her, dropping his head to her shoulder.

"Don't let him bother you. If the pirate could resist killing him then you can too," she smiles, resting her head against his.

"Remind me to ask him how he did that." Zelena laughs and turns back toward the TV.

"Want to watch this with me?" she offers, Hades raises his head sleepily.

"Sure, what is it?" he mutters half-heartedly.

"The rest of what we were watching last night?"

Hades sits up at that.

"Ooh, I was wondering about what was going to happen," he smirks.

"Nothing that eventful, I'm sure," Zelena murmurs, clicking on the program and putting her feet up on the table in front of her.

 _About fifteen minutes later..._ _  
_  
"Bloody hell is she going to…"

"GOOD GOD!" Hades widens his eyes at the screen, feeling the urge to dive behind the couch.

"What is she doing with that candle… Bloody hell!" Zelena starts laughing at what she's witnessing, even more so at Hades who has in fact buried his face into the nearest pillow.

"Is that even safe?" she muses as Hades dares to take another look, only to regret it again. Deeply.

"Zelena, fast forward," Hades groans from the pillow.

"Sorry what did you say? I thought you were 'wondering what was going to happen next'?" Zelena sniggers.

"Zelena!" Hades protests as she dissolves into more laughter.

"This is a form of torture!" he cries into the pillow, resulting in Zelena only laughing harder.

"You know I wouldn't be surprised if that was a form of torture…" Zelena says through her laughter resulting in Hades putting another pillow over his head!

"Oh, thank god that's over," Hades sighs in relief when the episode has finished. Zelena still laughing at him.

"It was intense, I give you that, but I didn't think it would bother you what with your fiery abilities," she says, smirking at her attempt at humor. Hades groans.

"That's different. That was just unnatural!" he complains, heading for the bathroom.

"Where are you going?" she laughs.

"To wash my eyes out with soap!" She laughs even harder…

After a long relaxing bath Hades returns to his and Zelena's bedroom. Zelena's probably still watching TV, he thinks, wondering if he could sneak a quick sleep in before dinner.

Deciding it possible, he removes his shirt and climbs into bed, hoping sleep will remove that horrifying image from his head.

The sound of the door opening making him open an eye, his eyes falling on Zelena, who is holding two rather well lit candles.

"No!" He shakes his head as she approaches him with them in her hands.

"Not afraid of a bit of fire are you?" she smiles coyly as she waves her hand over the flames turning them both to blue flames, advancing on Hades…

Regina Mills, having forgotten to arrange another day between Zelena and her daughter approaches the farmhouse only to be met with the sounds of laughter and Hades yelling about candlesticks.

"Ohh sis." she sighs as she leans against the door.

"What have you gotten into now?" 

**Authors Note: Thank you all for reading. I actually wrote this in May and due to my exams I forgot to post it. This AU is due to my love for Ally McBeal, yet my horror at this certain bit in it between Greg Germanns character Richard Fish and Lucy Li's character Ling! yet this chapter never would have been possible without the wonderful help and editing skills from** **FangirlSupreme** **who is an amazing writer and made this one shot the best yet! Thanks again for reading, the high school AU should be the next thing I publish x**


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